Even if you try to avoid conflict and stay out of politics, you can’t help but be aware of the extreme polarization and vocal disagreement rampant in our world these days. Everywhere you turn, every news source you see, there is clear evidence of different viewpoints, opinions, and values.
So what happens when you find yourself drawn into a discussion that turns heated? You want to give your perspective and defend your point of view, but as passions rise and tempers flare, you realize this could escalate from bad to worse in a heartbeat. How do you prevent hurt feelings, damaged relationships, and lingering animosity?
How do you defuse the situation?
There is one key response that nearly always defuses the tension and helps everyone involved remember to take a breath and remain a little more level-headed. That response? Humility.
So what does a humble response sound like? A post I recently saw and shared on LinkedIn includes these four statements, which I think perfectly reflect a position of humility:
- “I hadn’t thought of it like that. I understand now.”
- “Thanks for correcting me. I didn’t realize that.”
- “I should do some more research before I argue this point.”
- Or even, “I was wrong about that, and I’ve changed my mind.”
Of course the exact words will vary depending on your own personality and position and the context of the disagreement, but the heart behind them should be rooted in humility. As my colleague and LinkedIn connection, Kimberly Logan, said, “humility and empathy’s foundation lives on recognizing your limitations and errors.”
What other humble statements would you suggest for defusing tense disagreements? How do you show humility and respect for another person’s perspective? Can you do so without renouncing your own opinion?
As the post I shared gently reminds us, “There’s no shame in being wrong, only refusing to learn.”
