Sometimes Silence is the Best Answer

By Dan Nielsen

September 3, 2020


I recently saw a deeply thought-provoking quote (author unknown) that I feel is particularly relevant in today’s world of hyper-communication where so many people write, record, post, send, comment, or in some other way share so many opinions and perspectives on a daily basis. The quote is this: “Silence is the best answer to someone who doesn’t value your words.”

With that thought in mind, I’d like to share a portion of an article I wrote and published several years ago about a man who recognized the power of silence:

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Calvin Coolidge, the 30th President of the United States, was infamous for his taciturn ways, earning him the nickname “Silent Cal.” But Coolidge wasn’t quiet because he was extremely introverted or inarticulate—on the contrary, he was a highly visible president who entertained countless guests at the White House and proved to be a capable public communicator, holding frequent press conferences and speaking on the radio.

So why did he say so little during normal conversation? One thing Coolidge did say was, “No man ever listened himself out of a job.” Coolidge was a listener, not a talker. He realized the value of saying less and listening more.

It is in human nature to want to be heard; we all desire attention and recognition to some degree. Even if you don’t have a loquacious demeanor, like most of us you probably enjoy offering your “two-cents” and interjecting your own opinions and insights during conversation. For most, it takes much less discipline to speak than to refrain from speaking.

Speaking less and listening more has multiple benefits. By “keeping your mouth shut” you might very well keep yourself out of trouble—many a sticky situation could be averted if only certain things weren’t said. And I would also argue that it is better for people to think you’re reserved than to judge you as ignorant thanks to a foolish comment. As Coolidge wisely noted, “If you don’t say anything, you won’t be called on to repeat it.” 

Learn an important success principle from the example of Calvin Coolidge, and take the time to consider the power of sometimes not saying anything at all.

Say less, listen more, and keep in mind one more quote from the 30th U.S. President: “I have never been hurt by what I have not said.”

About the author

Dan Nielsen is the author of the books Be An Inspirational Leader: Engage, Inspire, Empower, and Presidential Leadership: Learning from United States Presidential Libraries & Museums. He regularly writes and speaks on leadership excellence and achieving greater success, and is available to deliver keynotes, lead workshops, or facilitate discussions for your group. LEARN MORE

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