In a world driven by connections, it’s not often that we consider that the ability to connect with others isn’t a skill that comes naturally to everyone. I have the privilege of being the type of individual who happens to come by this naturally, but for those who struggle in this area, I recommend a great article entitled, “11 Ways To Instantly Connect With Anyone,” by Dr. Travis Bradberry, author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0.
In his article, Bradberry discusses how this ability to connect is completely under your control. It is a skill you can develop by following different tips, and is a matter of “emotional intelligence.” The following are the 11 ways Bradberry gives to become more effective at connecting:
- “Leave a strong first impression.” Your first impression needs to be your best one because people formulate an opinion of you almost instantly.
- “Be the first to venture beyond the superficial.” Be willing to take your conversation deeper and invest in getting to know the person.
- “Ask good questions.” The type of question you ask will determine the answer.
- “Learn from them.” Be open to learning and use this as a deeper means to connect.
- “Don’t make them regret removing the mask.” Sarcasm, rudeness, and cynicism can do detrimental damage to a potential connection.
- “Look for the good in them.” Focus on the good instead of the bad. This is something contrary to our culture and can be one of the largest hindrances to making connections.
- “Smile.” “A warm smile is the universal language of kindness.” – William Arthur Ward
- “Use their name.” Bradberry writes, “Your name is an essential part of your identity, and it feels terrific when people use it.”
- “Follow the platinum rule.” While the “golden rule” is to treat people as you would want to be treated, the “platinum rule” is to treat people as they want to be treated.
- “Don’t make it a contest.” Constant “one-ups” do not help you connect! They only prove you are still more interested in yourself.
- “Turn off your inner voice.” Stop thinking about what to say next and just listen to the person. This will allow you to be more effective in your response.
Bradberry ends the article on a positive note: “The good news is that we’re programmed to connect with each other; we just keep getting in our own way.” If you want to be truly successful in making connections with individuals, I suggest you follow these excellent strategies and tips from Bradberry!